Enthusiasm

I'm reclaiming the enthusiasm of my childhood.
What can I hold responsible for it's decline?
Inhibition.
Fear.
Shame.
"Failure".

Getting excited, displaying enthusiasm, is vulnerable.
It's visibly showing that I'm jazzed about something.
I'm so into whatever it is, in fact, that I can't contain myself.
My excitement spills out in laughter,
my eyes light up,
I lean in,
I start talking with my hands,
I get consumed by the very thought.

Enthusiasm isn't too far from love.
I'm enthusiastic about everything that I love.

Goals crush enthusiasm.
I can't get excited about a checklist.
Fantasies on the other hand...
Dreams are exciting as hell.

Less check-listing, more dreaming.