Never Not

I may never
not think about certain people.
Certain boys. 
Ghosts of my past
that I look for any excuse to let out
and indulge
even just for a second.
When that song plays.
Or I add it to a playlist. 
When that bottle of champagne appears.
Or I'm in bed alone.
In the times between the 'busy'.
I start looking.

I may never not.
But I might just.